Modern relationships are different from that of what has been going on since ages. Traditionally when you start dating someone you are following the rules of dating. But in the world of modern dating, various concepts have emerged. One of it is Situationship. Situationship term that explains about a relationship that is romantic or sexual and doesn’t fit within the traditional concepts of friendship or any kind of partnership. In situationship, two people have emotional intimacy and might prefer to date each other or simply spend quality time and nothing else. They mostly don’t use terminologies like girlfriend or boyfriend. They basically don’t name their relationships. Then comes the term “Mutually Exclusive Situationship”. Now what is Mutually Exclusive Situationship?
What is Mutually Exclusive Situationship?
Mutually Exclusive Situationship is specific type of relationship that captures the core essence of a modern connection. This is more than just any casual dating but can’t be termed as one as it hasn’t entered the territory of being in a committed relationship.
For a person who is involved in mutually exclusive situationship, it is important to admit and understand your partner’s as well as your own emotional state of mind. Let’s explore the common ten signs that indicate you’re in a mutually exclusive situationship.
1. You Don’t Want Them To See Other People
In a mutually exclusive situationship, the couple agrees to certain commitments like being exclusive in terms of emotional, romantic connect as well as their sexual engagement. However, exclusivity still doesn’t lead to acceptance of naming. There’s a still a reluctance to label relationships in most cases. Couples don’t want traditional titles of “boyfriend/girlfriend”. This often leads to ambiguity arrising from a variety of reasons – recent breakups, commitment fear, or just a normal desire to keep things uncomplicated. The key point behind is the juxtaposition of a commitment from the partner to not see other people.
2. You Have Emotional Connections But No Future Plans
In a mutually exclusive situationship, the couple is often deeply connected with their partner. Both of you both have a clarity that you love discussing deep feelings, want to share significant moments and are there for each other the tough times. But there is absence of future centric discusstions. This kind of emotional intimacy is found in more serious relationships. The conversations about future do come up but never materialise. Discussions like these are often buried or skill-fully avoided. Both emotional intimacy and no future commitment signify you are in a mutually exclusive situationship.
3. You Talk To Each Other Daily But Nothing More
Your phone keeps lighting up with messages from them. You are constantly sharing messages and memes with each other, tell each each other about your day-to-day lives and are involved in daily check-ins. Yet, there is not much exchange of meaningful discussions. No deep talks about relationship or discussions of taking it to the next level exist. Frequent communication leads to making your connection constant but doesn’t lead to relational growth.
4. You Are Involved In Each Other’s Social Circles
You’ve met each other’s some of very close friends and some family members too. You are attending social gatherings frequently together, fitting easily into one another’s social circles. Yet, you feel there’s always disconnect like your partner is introducing you as “just a friend” or simply by your name and there are no significant label attached. This involvement into each others life, coupled without clear relationship terminology when around others happens in mutually exclusive situationship.
5. There’s Good Physical Intimacy But No Emotional Connect
Physical intimacy exists between you two which sometimes mirrors with the levels found in any formally committed relationships. However, the physical connection does not match with the emotional vulnerability and openness. You might experience moments of emotional intimacy, but they’re no where close to consistency. They are not fully reciprocated by your partner.
6. Glass Ceiling Exists Between You Two
In a situationship, there’s a definite limit to which a relationship can evolve. This concept is called “glass ceiling” which is felt by the couple individually but is never addressed openly. There have been attempts to deepen the connection and have serious commitment but there’s been no signifiant improvements. The efforts now seem to hit an unseen wall that neither of you can see through.
7. You Celebrate Special Occasions Together But With Limitations
You spend special occasions, holidays and birthdays together, which signifies that you have an essential place in each other’s lives. But there’s are loads of limitation. You are still not a plus-one at a wedding. Your partner doesn’t want to celebrate Valentine’s Day or other traditionally romantic days with you. This involvement in each other’s lives but with limitations proves you have a mutually exclusive situationship.
8. You Have Each Other’s Back with Unspoken Boundaries
You’re available for each other. You offer support to each other during difficult times and mostly celebrate success of each other together. However, there’s an unsaid commitment supporting this. You might not be first of their list that they call in a crisis situation, or there could be various aspects of their life they prefer not to discuss with you. Yet this support is bounded by limits, highlighting yo have a mutually exclusive situationship.
9. You Enjoy Activities Without Mutual Commitments
You prefer to different activities together and do enjoy. Things like going for outdoor adventures and having Netflix marathons is something you already have plans for. These activities are a witness that you have an enjoyable and fun companionship. However, both of you are reluctant to make long-term commitments like buying tickets for conferences that are far-off date or planning a trip months in advance. This enjoyment with a hesitation towards future planning explains the ambivalence of a mutually exclusive situationship.
10. You Acknowledge You Are Exclusive To Each Other Without Lables
The most important characteristic of any mutually exclusive situationship is that both of you acknowledge that you are exclusive to each other and you are in agreement of resistance to traditional labels. You both have each others word on not to see other people, explicitly. Still, you are in complete avoidance of any sorts of traditional labels that could put a name on your relationship as per conventional methods. This act of balancing exclusivity and aversion to labels prove you are in a mutually exclusive situationship.
Knowing these signs about a mutually exclusive situationship helps you understand your own relational dynamic. I think this should give you more clarity about your current situation. If the signs mentioned above are something you can relate to then you must have a heart to heart discussion with your partner. Tell your partner what you expect from them and ask them about the same and you’ll be able to understand where your relationship is going. Don’t forget Every relationship is different, and something that works for some might not work for you and visa versa. The idea is that you have to find balance for yourself and for your partner as well so you can respect each other’s feelings and can ensure that you have healthy relationship with no labels.